meat based vegetables
Commentary,  Funny,  WTF

A Meat-Based Carrot In Response To Vegetable-Based Cheeseburgers

You have to admit, this is a great country! In this episode of how awesome America is, we start with places like Burger King making cheeseburgers that have no burger in them. They’re made with plants because vegans need their cheeseburgers too.

Of course, vegans made it for other vegans and they say it tastes “a lot” like real beef. How they knew that it would, I have no clue. But if I believe everything I’m told in commercials, beef eating cheeseburger enthusiasts are saying the Impossible Whopper tastes just like a real Whopper.

Too bad I’ve been duped before. Diet Sodas do not taste anything like regular sodas. Off-brands don’t come close to what they are trying to imitate without a little salt, pepper, garlic, cheese, hot sauce, pepper spray…whatever you need to drown the bland taste of an off-brand.

So, I’m pretty sure a non-burger burger is going to taste nothing like a burger burger, otherwise known as a burger. Regardless, Arby’s has given us pure gold. I can now eat my vegetables.

Arby’s decided that if vegans were going to have Impossible Whoppers, than meat-eaters like me can have Megetables. Get it? Meat Vegetables? Come on! That’s good stuff!

America At Its Best

Michael Allen is the author of the newly released novel The Deeper Dark - When Haven Kayd returns home after being a POW for years, he returns to a world that has moved on without him. As he's playing catchup, the truth comes out about a scheme he was unknowingly the poster boy for and he learns about a hidden world that threatens everything he cares about. Available now at Amazon!