Have you ever had a picnic in the park and a bug flew into your eye? Have you thought about that? How in the world is that possible?
I was sitting at the picnic table and BAM, I got hit in the eye by a bug. I thought, what is that about? How long has it been flying? It had wide open territory to fly. But no, for some reason it couldn’t help itself but to fly right into my eye.
Doesn’t it know not to run into the big things? Do bugs ever crash into trees?
It’s flying around the entire park and all of a sudden, “Whoa! Whoa! I can’t stop myself from running into this thing that is 10,000 times my size.” BOOM!
That will not look good on its resume.
Employer: So, you want to be a bug?
Candidate: With all my heart. Dreamed about it all my life.
Employer: But, right here it says you crashed into an eye. That’s not good. We can’t have bugs flying around crashing into eyes. It’s bad for business.
Candidate: I learned my lesson though. I haven’t crashed into anyone’s eye since.
Employer: Well, we’ll consider you for the training program. If you do good there, we might come back and revisit this conversation.
And it’s a good thing that’s how they handle it. Incidences of bugs flying into people’s eyes are way down. But, it does happen. That’s why we need to raise awareness that there are bugs who will fly into your eye.
1 out of 6 bugs are suicidal or don’t understand the concept of life, therefore aren’t afraid of death.
3 out of 5 bugs have little to no experience flying.
We need better psychological evaluations and better training for the young bugs who will soon be taking their first steps into bug life. If we all do our part, we could end the Bug Flying into People’s Eye epidemic.
Yeah, that’s about as far as I’m going to go with this one…
The NOVEL that sold a thousand cases of Jack!